Friday, July 27, 2012

Every day I wake to the same thing. Every day I live out similar events, over and over and over. I hardly remember anything, even things I did yesterday. just that I keep repeating it again and again. Time seems to fly past me, I close my eyes for a moment and find myself in a completely different place. 

I am told to find people, told to end them. If I do as I am told, I am fed and given a place to sleep. If I fail... I have never failed. I can't fail. My life isn't my own any more, it's just an empty shell of what used to be. How... How did it come to this? Who decided that I am worthless and others are important? I didn't even have a name until recently. Shamshel... He gave it to me. He defines me. He is the reason I live and at the same time the one I hate most. I am not even sure my thoughts are mine.

I can't disobey what he says, he owns me now. Today I was rewarded for a successful mission. He gave me this computer. I don't want to forget any more. If I forget I can always read what I did. I have to end this cycle of repetition, its getting me nowhere.

No comments:

Post a Comment